Though it would be hard for anyone who doesn't live here to notice the difference, the clutter clearing continues.
In fact, it may never end. It's much slower than I had anticipated.
I've been concentrating on our office, and I've been paying particular attention to the contents of the file cabinet. You'd think shredding things like old bank statements, credit card statements and phone bills would be easy. You'd be wrong.
Want some insight into my madness? Let's consider credit card statements. A few years ago we had a break-in. The insurance company required proof that the items we were claiming actually existed. Among other things, it was handy to have credit card statements. With them I was able to show that items like my engagement ring "existed". Shredding more recent statements caused a few moments of anxiety as a result. I worried that I might need them, and I feared that I should hang on to them as proof. Just in case.
Bank statements were also problematic. It was sometimes difficult to consider what I spent money on in the past. Things I thought I couldn't live without then seem like foolish expenditures now. This was particularly true in cases where I could no longer remember what happened to the items in question.
Sifting through old phone bills brought a few sad moments. There were memories of talks with my sister in the days before MS changed her life so dramatically. And chats with my grandparents who have since passed away. And conversations with friends who I have since lost touch with.
Still, it feels good to clear these things out, to have a moment of remembering, to learn what I can, and to let go.
Even though you can't really see the difference the room is starting to feel lighter. And so am I.
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| This is but one of many, many bags of shredded paper that went to the road. It's normal to get up at stupid o'clock to take moodily-lit photos of your recycling, right? |
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